So my daughter is having her 12th birthday sleepover tonight since her birthday falls shortly after Christmas. That being the case, no one can come to a party over the holidays and we let her have MLK weekend to throw down!
My wife is upstairs snuggling our other 2 kids and I am on "stay up and see what they are doing" duty. Hence I am online and was following JoBlo.com's link to the new Rotten Tomatoes site... then I saw that National Treasure: Book of Secrets got a low rating... I rated it and it threw me to the sign up page... and then this Journal page... then I figured if I am going to blog, I should blog where everyone blogs... and here we are.
First off, this party.It's ten girls, all twelve years old. Like 6 of them have cell phones. They are in sixth grade. Who needs a cell phone in sixth grade? They aren't Doogie Howser (my kid and half those girls are in the Gifted and Talented school but they aren't saving lives when they're on call.)
I know for some of these kids, it's the leash the parent has when they are at the other parents house. The cell phone industry is booming off of divorced parents getting their kids phones under the guise of "so you can talk to me whenever you want" or "so you can call your father when you want" or even the idea of "knowing I can get in touch with you"But do they?Their parents all dropped them off and said "have a great night. see you tomorrow!" When is this checking in happening? Is it when they are at the mall? When they are at the movies at the mall?
If you call your kids at the movies to check in, you deserve to die. Why should I pay money to have you gabbing at the kid you can't trust sitting next to me?
Are these kids really calling their dad (assuming that over 90% live with mom) just to say hey? Let me tell you: this 12 year old of mine, is my step-daughter. Her dad calls every day. Every. day. She doesn't need a cell phone to talk to him. But when we are on a trip or she hasn't heard from him for some reason, we are the good guys and ask, do you want to call. No, she doesn't. So she has her fix of talking to him during the week and she sees him every other weekend.
So if she had a cell phone to keep in touch-would she?
I guess its a per kid scenario. But I know these dads are at the soccer games every weekend, whether it's "their" weekend or not. I am at the games too. I see them there. I know who's divorced.
Also, I know the amount of work these kids have. It's kinda outrageous. and I know that when she's done with her 8th grade math (in 6th grade, mind you) and her current events reading and response and her history reading and science write up and mandatory 30 minute "free reading" that when she plops down on the couch, she doesn't want to deal with the debaucle of should I veg-out with mom and step-dad and brother and sister or should I spend more time trying to connect with bio-dad?
She veges. And that's OK. So she wouldn't need the phone for that. And if she really wanted to, she can use the hard-line!
So if dad is buying the phone to instill the "whenever you want" idea, I think he'll be waiting by the phone for a while. But if mom is buying the phone, she is probably just trying to buy the love from her kids. I'm sorry but, that's it. You have a house phone. You can let your kids use it whenever you see fit. You could tell your kids, I know he's still your dad and you can call him whenever you want. Done. Everything should be copacetic. You buying her a phone to do the same thing is buying a one up trinket.
So if we are to believe that all parents are even keeled and don't try and buy their kids love, it must be the "just in case" scenario that these parents are buying into.These girls in my basement must have parents that want to get in touch with them "just in case".
Just in case:
- They forgot where they dropped the kids off (they can't drive, they aren't telling you one thing and doing another)
- They need to double check where they are because the kids got someone to take them elsewhere (you don't need a cell phone to find your kid, you need to raise your kid to tell you what the hell they are doing)
- They need to know when you are coming home (didn't you tell them what time to come home? Do you know what time the movie is? Add 2 hours)
Again, don't call during the movie. Your dumb kid that you can't trust, is bothering me.
My daughter can have a cell phone when she can drive or buy it herself. I may be some sort of old-fashioned that way buy I didn't get a phone until I graduated college in 2000. When I moved to Chicago. And had a car. And a job.
But I am willing to get her a phone when she drives. I think the worst thing is to break down. Granted, I take care of my cars. It shouldn't happen. But nothing is perfect. Raditaor tubes blow. Rods get thrown. Batteries explode on ignition (no really, they do sometimes) Tires get flats. But my kids will change their own. For god's sake people, learn to change a tire. Do the whole thing in 15 minutes or wait for AAA for up to 2 hours?
Cell phones are tools. Yes they have crazy cool features. But it's a phone. When do you really need to have that tool at your disposal? Not 12, says I.
